There’s a caterpillar in my raspberry

I bought a punnet of succulent raspberries from the store

On a hot summer’s day, nothing satisfies me more!

I sat down to enjoy my mouth watering, juicy berries

The excitement, elation,  overwhelmed me, I was merry!

Enthusiastically I sucked a ripe berry through my lips

And felt something fall onto my tongue, just the tip

So I popped out my tongue just to stare for a minute

And found staring back, was a CATERPILLAR, dang it.

So I picked up the caterpillar and placed it in front of me,

And I told it “Go on, crawl away and be free

Don’t let life pass you by

And because I didn’t eat you, you’ll become a BUTTERFLY!"

{DISCLAIMER: What really happened was ... I put a raspberry in my mouth and before I bit into it I felt something on my tongue. 

I poked my tongue out, and found a dead caterpillar. Gross. Just glad I didnt chew it.

I like the version in my head better.}

Sobe of the BirthDAY Week

You flatterer you.

TMGB

The next page of stupid

Or maybe this one?

The Mean Green Bean

I'm entertaining myself with this story I'm writing. It's ridiculous, its a "children's story" and I'm illustrating it for my kids.

Why?

I want them to learn some valuable life lessons in an entertaining way.

Here are a couple of pages.

See if you can determine the theme.

I'll add a few pages over the next month.

Maybe, when it comes to sex ed I'll do this for them.

HAHAHAHAHAHA.

a day of firsts ...

And most definitely not the good kind.

I forgot to pick Mana up from school yesterday.

By the time I remembered and realized, I was already 35 mins late.

When I did remember I freaked out, jumped up and ran out of my office in a panic.

I saw my sister and I'm sure she saw the absolutely wild look in my eye and she said "Stephen said the school called, Mana is ok, he's in the office" as I bolted out the door to my car.

Obviously my overactive imagination envisioned all manner of frightful scenarios, and as I drove to the school to pick Mana up, I called my husband completely hysterical.

There was crying, hyperventilating, you know, the whole deal.

Stephen, as usual, was awesome. Calm and understanding, he talked me through my over reaction, tried to comfort me when I was feeling utterly worthless, and reminded me "you'll have a hard time getting over this, you won't do it again, so don't be so hard on yourself".

I imagined my poor sensitive son sitting in the school office crying (he's a crier) and the emotional toll it would have taken on him. 

I know, I got a bit carried away, I often do when it comes to my kids.

So, I pull into the parking lot, run into the office and the Principal is sitting in his office and asks me, with a smile on his face, who I'm there to pick up.

I tell him Mana, and his teacher walks out of an office and says "'l'lI go get him, he's playing outside with the other kids".

The Principal walks out of his office, a knowing look in his eye and says "This must be the first time you've forgotten your child".

I sign him out of school and take a seat to wait for him, trying to slow my heart palpitations.

I hear my boy before I see him, and he's all smiles, holding his teachers hand and runs over to me, filled with excitement "I played soccer with some bigger kids, it was super cool Mummy!".

I reached down to cuddle him, finally relieved he's safe (as if he wasn't) and hear "Mummy, stop, don't cuddle me any more". Tear.

No worries for my son.

And now I'm left with the "mum guilt" or "mom guilt" as my friend put it.

That's the guilt I will endure when I miss anything, significant or not, in my child's life.
Then there is the "mum work guilt" when I miss anything because of work.

Ah that's a choice you make when decide to work.

Damn, sometimes!

you disappeared on me!

Ah reader. That I did.

I disappeared, for a spell.

My grandma died.

I cried about that.

I went to New Zealand. 

And actually missed living there.

My job changed. 

My son is going to pre-school.

Sometimes you get offline to deal with life.

But ... I'm back.

And full of snark.