Foreign Translation rules my life!

I love reading other people's blogs.

DIY, crafts etc, so awesome.

What is more awesome than reading someone's blog?

Reading blogs that have been translated with google translater from their foreign tongue to english.

My husband and sister can attest to this.

I'll show them what I'm reading, tears streaming down my face laughing, and I get the "why are you so whack?" stare.

For example ...

I clicked harbandinu good on the small Rognan Evey other day. It served to the big insisted hárband get for themselves and cheerful mother much by :-) I found nothing but a lace material, so I cut a piece off, enough to get your head around it and may make it together . fastened so much pink in the dusk that has hang around for me. But she came eye to stall the balls that I've been doing and assured me that she had to get one in the pink band.

HAHAHAHA!

Since I'm not technically mocking a person coz its google that is translating, I feel like it's ok.

Ah well, sometimes I just feel like laughing, and sometimes I just like being a dick.

Monday, Baking Day

And Monday = Life Style Change (Diet) day!

Let's get real for a minute people (myself).
 I'm a chub. Nice and chubby.

I'm not the self deprecating woe-is-me-I'm-so-fat sort of a person, looking for some sympathy.
I'm simply stating a fact.

I don't think I'm fat, I'm not overly obese, i'm just unnecessarily chunky.

Or pleasantly plump, which I like to say, coz it sounds far more cheerful doesn't it ?

My sister and I walked in to our mirrored elevator at work the other day and she was standing in front of me.

Now, she is a good 4 inches taller than me, so when I looked up and saw her in the mirror I had to do a double take, thinking it was me.

When she stepped to the side and I saw myself I started laughing, like cracked up loud obnoxious laughter. 

My reflection ?

It was like someone squashed my sister and her taller mass quickly became my shorter wider mass.

She's Luigi, I'm Mario.

Do I wonder, how did I get here ?

No. 
I know how I got here, I eat cake and crap daily, and I'm quite honestly surprised I'm not bigger than I  am with the amount I eat.

This isn't going to turn into a weight loss blog, or something like that, but I feel like writing about that fact that I'm sick of feeling like crap.

How do I get in gym time, and work, and devote what little time I can to my kids ?

Is it selfish of me to want to go to the gym ?

Portion Control for me ?

Non-existent. 

Why is it that my eyes are bigger than my stomach so I load my plate, then when I realize I can't eat it all, the need to not waste food kicks in and I consume it all ?

It's a vicious cycle, one I fully intend to break.

I don't want to be skinny, coz then I'd be the full package (HAHAHA) but I do want to be healthy and fit all my clothes and give myself a Merry Christmas, and since 1 month won't cut it, maybe a Happy New Year or at least be on the way to a Happy 2012.

Gobble Bubble

Ah Thanksgiving.

A day off work, a day with family and friends, and a repast to consume (unnecessary) copious amounts of food.

Round One.

Salad, or salads as it were yesterday.

Round Two.

Turkey and cranberry sauce, roast potatoes, roast sweet potatoes with brown sugar caramelized on top, stuffing, green bean casserole, gravy, cauliflower and cheese.

Round Three

(same as round two)

Round Four

Pie.

Pumpkin pie, apple pie, banoffee.

So good and yet so bad!

I often wonder why we (I) insist on eating more than is necessary.  

At a certain point, your body no longer enjoys what you are eating and starts to repel what you are doing .Your waist line starts running away from you thus expanding. 

At least, that’s what happens to me. 

Sometimes I think I can feel my skin tightening.

My clothes begin to anger and I believe they tighten in an effort to try to constrain me from the harm I am inflicting on myself, as if to say “No, stop it, we can’t take it.”

Even the clothes on the picture of myself I doodled today, look menacing “Why can’t you fit me? You did when you put me on this morning. Three hours later, and we need to be replaced?”

Oh willpower, why do you abandon me when I need you so?

That fluffy, delicious cream all whipped and poised, enticing me, calling me “put me on your pie, you know you won’t be satisfied without my creamy peaks atop that sweet layer of pumpkin”. Naughty, naughty pie.

And that is why I am sick today.

Give Thanks.

With it being Thanksgiving and all tomorrow, it's that time of the year, the time to openly give thanks to all that you are grateful for and it's expected.

Let's start with Stephen Giles.

I've blogged about him a number of times click here Ode to Sexy for a refresher.

Is he or are we perfect? Clearly not, if you've read anything I've posted. Though we are perfect for each other. I'm thankful for his hard work, and the example he is to our boys to be a good man, and a wonderful husband.
Thanks to my inlaws for raising a stellar son.

Thankful tear.

My babies.

Being a parent is one of the most fulfilling and rewarding jobs I will ever have. I can be quite selfish, narcissistic, but my kids make all the hard work and long days seem worth it. After a rough day at work, I can pick them up, and listen to them sing in the car all the way home and it reminds me that all the crap? Doesn't matter.

I love their little smiles. Their constant need to sit on me whenever I'm close to them.

Their kisses and their cuddles.

Their nightly good night farewell?

"Mummy, I love you a million times, you're the best, you're pretty and beautiful, see you in the morning".

Wouldn't trade that for the world.

Proud tears.

The home that I have to live in.

Our home is a simple home, built on love and a hard work.

I'm warm in the winter, A/C in the summer, and there is room for family to visit and stay.

The job that I have.

I complain, I get frustrated, it's cathartic for me, but I love it.

Working affords me opportunities I may not be able to have otherwise.

If I lived in NZ, I'm not confident I would have these same opportunities.

6 years at the same place and it's still a challenge I'm enjoying.

I work with some awesome people and some interesting people, I love it.

Food & Clothing.

Well, the jobs Stephen and I have help us to eat what we want and wear what we want.


(Feels a little like I'm saying a prayer right now)

Which leads me to my parents.

Champs. 
Thanks Mum for giving me a crack when I needed it, I could have been a lot more off if you didn't.

Nah, my mum is awesome though. If you know her, you know it. No need to explain, I'd be here all day. Taught me how to communicate.

My dad. 
Saying no, and making me scab off my friends for whatever you didn't feel like giving me money for, was a challenge. Challenge Accepted.

I had to get a little more creative to do what I needed with 15 cents.

That's what kids need these days. 
Someone to say NO more often.


Thanks for raising us in the gospel, and for the righteous influence you have been, and have encouraged.
I know I rarely go the religious route on this blog, but it's something I'm truly grateful for and was blessed to have as a strong influence in my life.

America. 
More specifically Utah.
I may not be the most outdoorsy person, but I love the mountains, and the cost of living, and the cleanliness.

Thank you for letting me live and thrive here.

Appreciate it!

My Brothers and Sisters.

All awesome.

Ariel - You're a pretty awesome big brother. A bit hard to deal with a sister like me so close in age. Who was the blubbering mess at your mission farewell? HAHAHA. You work hard to provide for you're family and you've got some beautiful girls. Stoked we are so close.

Phil - Even though you think you were born a man, I'll still remember you being scared of the dark and not wanting to run around the house. Contrary ;) Who knew you would get all into politics and rebuilding Christchurch?
Love your boy and wish you were closer.

Mims - Best. Sister. Ever.

Luke - What can I say, you've always kept us entertained, from your stories, your antics (shaving your hair with a razor at 9?) to your pictures with your earrings and tattoo's (don't think I don't remember that) never a dull moment with you around.

Sam - On his mission right now, but so proud of him and his spiritual and intellectual growth. Growing up and not crying every day? Way to go Sammy.

Tapua - You're pretty much the big brother with the little kids, and you've got a lot to live up to ;) But, you're a smart and sensitive, and I'm proud of you little brother.

Josiah - You my little brother, are a good boy. Be an individual, be who you want and form your own ideas on things.

Bronte - Little sister, you're lucky you look like me. I'm glad you're opinionated, we all are, and we will clash, but you'll need that independant streak you have ;) Little sister, you're lucky you look like me. I'm freakin' beautiful :p


Feleti - Our other brother. Man, you're the smartest person I know besides Mum, and I wish we saw each other more, but alas, we are too far. 
Who knows half the things I've learnt from you ?
Clearly not me if you didn't tell me ;)


Grateful for some sweet sisters-in-law and the two brothers-in-law I have.
Good on ya for marrying my siblings, or being my husbands siblings.
Ambitious maneuver.

Extended Family.

Man, I'm truly blessed to be related to so many wonderful, sometimes beautiful, people.

Friends.

Well, you're going to have to take a good hard look at yourself.

You actually chose to be my friend. Consciously made the choice.

HAHAHA on you.

That's enough for this post I think, feeling a bit cheesy at the moment.

If I don't say it enough, I'm sorry, but I'm thankful to be blessed with a good life, and the good sense to recognize that I am blessed.

Happy Thanksgiving suckers!

Old Bugger

This is what you can expect from me on your birthday.

Nothing but love from me.

You're welcome for this one Blakey.

Emotional Range of a Child

This is my emotional range.

Well, more like this.

 

Presents make me super happy.

I'm materialistic, what can I say ?

I'll make lists of things I want for any occassion, with links to sites to be sure the hubs knows EXACTLY what I want.

My everyday joy ?

Driving home with the kids.

They sing to me, tell me about their day, fight.

Joy.

What can make me cry?

Fighting with Stephen.

Though, sometimes I can get so angry I can cry.

Or so happy I can cry.

Cry baby.

When I wake up, I'm not usually in a neutral state.

I'm always somewhat teetering on the edge of aggression.

Probably, because most of time time, I haven't had enough sleep.

This is why I believe I suffer from chronic aggression. (TRUE STORY)

I'm a planner. I love task lists, grocery lists, present lists.

Knowing things in advance so I can co-ordinate my nap time is necessary.

When things don't go according to plan ?

Nostrils flare, eyes get big, face tightens and morphs into a shark.

Brothers and sisters of mine, sound familiar?

Mother.

My sister is the same when it comes to the anger issue.

I think we have a high level of testosterone running through our bodies.

She's pregnant right now, which intensifies the aggression, so I tell people she got herself pregnant, with all that testosterone.

Maybe when she pushes out the baby, she'll push out the agro.

Nah.

Something to work on for me maybe?

Maybe.

What's the time Mr. Wolf ?

Punctuality is important to me.

Why?

Being #2 in a family of 9 + cousins and friends, meant, if you weren’t ready to go, you got left behind.

An awesome 3 hour walk home from school because you were dicking around is enough to make you never do that again.

So now?

I INSIST on being on time.

I actually have heart palpitations when I think of showing up late to something.

So if I’m late?

It was unavoidable, and I feel TERRIBLE about it.

I always make sure to include the time it takes to get myself, and my kids ready as well as account for travel time, to ensure I arrive on time. I’m hardwired that way.

Socially, I don’t have the same expectations for others that I have for myself. I couldn’t care less if people show up late when we have things. If you show up, it’s all good.

Professionally?

I’ve got no time for it.

I think it comes from the past few years listening to reasons why people are late.

“It snowed”

Once ? Ok.

Every day?

You live in Utah. It snows 8 months of the year. This is not a surprise. There are a number of avenues you could explore which would give you the weather forecast for the next day. The news. The internet. An App. I invite you to use those, and plan accordingly.

"I slept in" ?

I get it, it happens and I love me some sleep.

Thanks for being honest, now don't make a habit of it.

The early bird gets the worm.

TRUE

The late bugger misses out on everything awesome!

SOMETIMES TRUE.

SCHLEEP!

I LOVE sleep.

LOVE it.

On a good weekend, my wonderful husband will keep the kids occupied while I have a nice 5 hour nap, which, for me, is heavenly!

On a normal week/work day, I’ll get the mighty 7hrs worth of slumber, which is just not enough for me.

I’ll often plan my weekend around my naps.

Dinner and a movie at 6 ?

Nap at 12. Up around 4. Shower and be ready to go by 5:30 to arrive on time (I’ll blog about my obsession with being on time later)

Sleeping somewhere other than my bed ?

If I’m within driving distance (less than two hours) I’m driving home.

We’ve had a tempurpedic bed for over 5 years, and my body rejects sleep when it isn’t cushioned by memory foam. 

It’s like cuddling a cloud.

Interrupt my sleep ?

You ever tried to wake a hibernating bear ?

If you want your face scratched, try it.

I feel as passionate about sleep, as I do about cake.

It's delicious.

Siesta ? 

Sounds like a bit of a good time to me!

Inemuri ?

Nah.

I want to dream.

If we get into my dreams ?

Apparently, in my dream mind, I'm a professional fighter (clearly, reading this blog enlightens you to my aggressive nature) a model (HAHAHAHA) AND I'm pretty sure I can fly.

Man, I have the best flying dreams.

Sometimes I have to get a running start, but most times I can just push of the wall, like a tumble turn when you swim, and I'll take off.

Is there a job, where you sleep all day ?

A professional bed tester ?

Sounds like a bit of me. 

UN-DAY!

You know what one of my favorite things to do is?

Kick it at home in my undies!

Not in a skanky way, in an awesome, freeing, I don’t have to wear pants coz I’m going to seriously sit here and marinate in my deliciousness kind of way.

I know this is a key tool for my sister to relax too.

I can’t do it so much anymore, since my kids are old enough to tell me “Mummy, put some pants on” but it’s awesome for a number of reasons.

·         Less clothes to wash

·         Pants wont ride up when you’re lying on the couch watching tv

·         You won’t trip over your pant legs when you walk around the house

·         Shirt doesn’t get bunched up when watching tv

·         You don’t have to “drop trou” when going to the toilet

I mean, those reasons alone are satisfactory enough to have a mandatory undie day once a week.

Another good reason?

·         Easy access for some good loving with the husband

Undie Day will help with your sanity, give it a go.

Get a big whiff of that comfort

A few months ago I read in the Q&A section in Men's Health something that I'll randomly think about, and start cracking up.

The question that was posed ...

"Why do other people's farts stink, and mine don't?"

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

The answer that was given explained how people are used to their own smells, and can be comforted by their own farts.

Other peoples scent can be an assault on your senses.

Obviously it was far more in depth and scientific than my definition, but that's what I remembered from it.

Since we all know how I love post secret, I ran across this secret on the PS app the other day and couldn't stop laughing.

Mmmm, comfort.

Woman's World

It's a man's world.

Working in a management position in corporate America?

Well, you gotta have some pretty big balls.

You know what I have to say ?

*pointing at my own chest*

"These aren't boobs.

 These are balls. 

And as far as balls go ? 

They're the biggest pair of nuts you've ever seen."

Part Time Manager, Part Time Mum, FULL TIME LEGEND!

As a full time working wife & mother, I often find myself feeling incomplete.

A part time mother, who, during the hours of 7am - 6pm, has to dedicate all my time to my job, an adult day care provider.

I'm joking ... or am I ?

A number of my daily professional interactions result in the inspiration for my ramblings.

Crocodile Tears? 

Oh yes I did have to endure.

Two on Two?

You KNOW that's a survival tactic.

(Pooh is taboo, but honestly, we all feel awesome after dropping a 5 pound deuce)

Back to what I was talking about before .... 

I never quite feel like I'm a full time anything, you know?

I mean, I KNOW that I am, but there is always a part of me that wants to be more in the one or the other direction, more often than not, more of a mother.
Just give more time, or be more.

A really good friend of mine gave me some advice a long time ago, when I was on the fence emotionally about going back to work after having child #2.

After a little thing called personal revelation enlightened the hubby and I to the fact that it was right for me to go back to work, I had to get past the mental and emotional obstacles.

That piece of advice has stuck with me, and I think about this when I wonder 
"What the hell am I doing?".

It was more or less along the lines of the type making it worth it.
When I have to be away from my kids, I want to be sure I'm doing the best job I am capable of,  in whatever role I'm fulfilling.

I try to make a point, since I can't spend "quantity" time with my kids, to spend quality time with them.

I still suck. A lot. When it comes to parenting.

I work hard to be able to give my kids opportunities in life.

You know why else I work?

Coz its not the fifties anymore.

Kidding.


Everyone faced with the same dilemma I've been faced with has to make a choice that they can live with.
Being a stay at home mother?
Now THAT'S a tough job.


Sometimes I do wish I stayed at home with my kids.
Would it make them better people?
I don't know, they're pretty awesome.
Would I be the best person I could be if I stayed at home?
Who could say.
Maybe it's better for my kids to spend less time with me.

I do enjoy working though.

I've got a pretty intense job, I manage a number of people, and a number of conflicting priorities, and I'm pretty good at, if I do say so myself, and I DO.

I need to be sure I put that out there in the blog-o-sphere.

People interest me.

People's reactions to different situations intrigue (infuriate) me.

And seeing something successfully implemented from beginning to end, is extremely satisfying.

I work, therefore I am.

HELL NO.

I LIVE! 
Therefore I am.

When I got married, I entered into a partnership with my husband.

We both work full time, we share the load at home, we share everything with each other, I mean isn't that the point?.

It's not his responsibility to provide everything for our family, it's OUR responsibility to figure out this life together, and get through it together, the best way we know how.

Side by side huh Stephen Giles ?
Enjoying the ride together.

Ready or Not, Here Change Comes.

Change.

What's consistent? 

The lack of control you can have over it.

When people move away, move on, the change, can flat out suck.

I guess it's the uncertainty of what remains for those left behind, or the uncharted territory for those plodding forward, that is constant.


It can often be unsettling.


Change can be heavy in your pocket, and on your mind.

Ah change, sometimes, you need to piss off.

Post Secret App

I know it's not a "secret" when you acknowledge you wrote it, but whatever.

I like post secret, when it's funny and insightful. 

Sometimes though, it can really drag the tears out of me.

I posted for the first time the other day, and here is my deep dark secret.

Blame On, Blamers!

You know what drives me nuts? Lack of accountability.

If you decide to open your mouth and say something, or decide to put your thoughts into action, guess what?  It’s time to take responsibility for the outcome!

I will make a point of accepting responsibility for what I say, do or write. And if you read this blog, you know I’m an idiot and I post on ridiculousness.

Don’t get me wrong, I do care when something I say or do hurts someone’s feelings, I’m not that heartless, but I think people are too sensitive, to quick to jump on the defensive.

If you begin a statement with “It’s not my fault …” then I’m going to tell you it is your fault, you’ve made some poor vocabulary choices. 

"It's not my fault I'm late, my alarm didn't go off", "It's not my fault, I ran out of gas"

Here's an idea, let's find someone to blame for everything that isn't our fault shall we?

I’m generalizing, I know I am, and I make things too simple, I often do that, but it’s easier for me to compartmentalize everything. Life doesn’t have to be complicated.

Everyone is entitled to their opinions, and able to express said opinions as they see fit.

You’ve been given the “Freedom of Speech”, which is the freedom to speak without censorship. Don’t forget, you’ve also been given the “Freedom to listen to whatever the hell you want to listen to” and the “Freedom to believe in whatever you deem worthy to believe in”.

If something someone says offends you, say something, or walk away. There are times when you have to listen, if I don’t like what I’m hearing, I mentally tune out or draw on my phone.

“I’m just being speaking the truth” doesn’t necessarily mean someone IS speaking the truth. It’s an opinion, or their version of the truth, so take it as it is.

I’m rambling, I can hear it, but this is what I feel like ranting about and since it’s my blog, I can do what I want. (Wonder if this will take my readership from 2 down to 1? JULES & LIZ, STAY WITH ME!!).

ANYWAY …..

You choose to open your mouth and say what you say.

You choose to put into action your random thoughts.

You choose to react to situations the best way you know how.

Every day we make thousands of millions of choices. Own it! Be accountable for yourself, and the world will be a much greater place.